Jerome Yaovi Onipede is a marriage/relationship consultant, matchmaker and a retreat Host.
He is the chief consultant at Jeromeistalking LTD.
He has written articles on relationship, marriage, and the family in The Sunday Sun, The Nigerian Tribune, This
Day Glitterati, The Vanguard Allure, and The Street Hawker which has been eye openers for its readers locally and internationally.
He has also featured as a resource person on television locally and internationally.
He is an associate of TRACOM Group, USA, and the first African certified to facilitate the social styles and versatility.
He spoke to thelaurel.com.ng on the steps couples could take to enliven and recharge their relationships this yuletide
If couples are going to recharge their relationship, they need a charger and there’s so many ways they can charge it up.
One of such ways is that once or twice a year, couples have to plan a getaway and a retreat.
A getaway, where they can be able to attend a retreat during the getaway. There is a time that you need to get away stress around you that has contributed to making both of you not seeing each other anymore because you are so busy with your work that is so hectic.
You are busy with all the schedules that have to do with family members, sister wedding ceremony, next Sunday, it’s your your dad 70th birthday anniversary, after that, the next weekend, you have to go for your bosses’ wife occasion.
It’s always from one occasion to the other event and your life is so crowded and before you know it, both of you are not speaking with each other. You no longer talk about each other but you talk.
You look at each other but you no longer see each other. When was the last time you saw that your spouse has a scar behind her ears? When was the last time you realised your husband has rashes on his body, or eczema at his his back?
You may have sex every day that does not mean you see each other, it is just normal routine and because of all of these things, you need to spend time alone. You need to move away from everyone else and spend time alone with each other.
This might be something you can only do once or twice in a year. I know about that because my wife and I hold retreat for married couples. It requires your time, your focus, your energy and it requires finance as well.
It’s something you plan for. When you are there. Play with each other, don’t go for destination retreat because you want to go and look for business opportunities and then you give your spouse the idea that because you want to be together with him or her.
Always be sincere with yourself about your motives, concerning why you come into agreement with your spouse over anything. You need a lot of that.
What do you do when you are not on a getaway or a retreat? Take time out, you need to date each other again? People will tell you that my wife and I still date; we love to go on date. We make time for dates. You may be surprised to know that we know so many restaurants, so many movie houses, so any interesting places around because we go on dates. Whatever we teach people, we have to practice it first, that is why when we talk to you about it, you now we know what we are talking about.
Don’t wait for Valentine’s Day to give gifts. People love it when they are giving gifts. It shows that that person was on your mind. It shows the other person that this person has me in her mind all these while and it will spice up your love.
Sit back to watch movies together, dance together, get good music, and dance together, don’t be shy. Start it, dance together. Start it, you will love it, you will continue in it and you will grow in it. Do you know that when your children watch you dance together, when your children watch you sit before a movie, watch it together, enjoying it together then it gives them assurance, it makes them to have peace of mind, it gives them confidence, it makes them to feel yes, they are in a right home. It does not make them afraid; these children will grow up well at home. Even when they are teenagers, they will want to come back home. They know their home is a haven of peace, a haven of love, and a haven of joy, they will always want to come back home. There are lots more, but start with these ones.
